Fingers are so weird!
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Argument I heard on the bus
- Guy 1: no, niggah, gay bros can raise babies. Look at that warthog motherfucker and that ferret thing that raised Simba. And that niggah became king of motherfucking Africa.
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My mom said if this post gets 500,000 notes she’ll buy me a horse mask like this one for my birthday!
WE’LL GET YOU THAT HORSE MASK
We get everyone fucking everything. We can at least get a horse mask.
You’re gonna get this mask, watch us
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if I ever don’t reblog this please assume I am dead
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And God said unto Abraham, “Abraham.”
And Abraham replied, “What.”
God said to John, “Come forth and receive eternal life.” But John came fifth and won a toaster.
And Judas approached the rabbis and Pharisees saying, “The one whom I kiss is the one you seek.”
To which they responded, “Gay.”
And thus, God made Eve. And she was bammin’ slammin’ bootylicious.
Amen.
(via jimmoriartyhasthetardis)
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(via 4gifs)
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skin doesnt stain why aren’t we making clothes out of human skin
This is why this website scares me
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I put his big fat wiener in my mouth and my inner goddess did the Macarena
That’s a one hundred percent true and unedited quote from Fifty Shades of Grey
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